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Being a leader comes in many forms: you might be the leader of a team or company, an agent who leads clients through transactions, or a leader in your family. Being a leader is a balance of holding others accountable without getting attached to their actions.

As a leader, you know things don’t always go according to your plan.

How many times have you built out a program, exercise, or routine that hasn’t worked out? How many times have you been motivated to reach a new goal, only to be met with lackluster involvement from the rest of your team?

The Desire to Motivate

You have probably heard people you work with exclaim their desire to achieve new goals, only to watch them fall short of doing the work.

As a team lead, we want is so bad for them. We want the people on our team to succeed. We know if they follow the steps and put in the hours, they will see the results, they just have to do the work. And we can keep showing them and showing them, but if they do not want it, the results will not come.

The Frustration of Working with Unmotivated People

While there are strategies that can be implemented to motivate a team of people, the desire must be intrinsic of the individual for lasting results. Anyone with huge goals has to put in extra hours. There’s a lot of people with grand ambitions who don’t prove it through action. It can be frustrating to see this kind of effort.

It hurts even more when it’s somebody who you are close to. Whether it is someone you work with or have a personal relationship with; because you want these people to achieve all their goals. The frustration amplifies when it is someone you are spending YOUR time investing in.

Keep Giving and Drop Expectations

You cannot want something more for somebody else than they do. And the reverse is true. We can’t expect anybody to want something more than us. To outwork us. To put in more hours. To care as much as we do. We can’t have that expectation when leading a group of people, when building a team or company.

This doesn’t mean you can’t help them – you absolutely have to. You absolutely need to be in the position to bring people forward. To invest in people, with no expectations.

You can, and should, continue to create the systems, hold people accountable, and guide them through the process. Continue to give and be selfless every day.